I'm not so sure that's sugar...

I think I've been putting crack in my coffee every morning. Hmmm.

Sometimes I can't help but laugh at myself. I'm a very funny person. At least I think so.

I just called Darin and left a message where I seemed to psychobabble about some kind of "Dating for Dummies handbook" that I hadn't received yet. Seriously, if this guy actually calls back and accepts my invitation to dinner then I know there must be something mentally wrong with him. Ahhh.

I just received an inner-office email from a lady up in accounting. The email simply stated the names of the five people in the business office today. They must be getting swamped with phone calls or something. Anyways, I responded to her email by stating that "it sounds like a good time and I'd be right up with the rum." Well, that was probably highly inappropriate for office banter, but it was kinda funny.

I mean seriously dude, give me a break. I live in the Mid-west, with my parents, I work in a padded room with a straight jacket all week, my son is convinced that I'm not his original mother because I make him eat Teryaki chicken, I'm totally in love with a married man who most likely will always be a married, the highlight of my week so far is that I got a really good deal at the Goodwill store last night, oh and that HOT red-head who virtually smacked my ass, I talk to horses when I'm drunk and my best friend is an ugly six pound Boston Terrier who thinks she's a cat. I have to laugh to keep from going insane. Or...do I laugh because I've already crossed the threshold of insanity? Hmmm.