Spring in the village
I feel things deeply. Characteristic of a pisces. And I'm PMSing, which makes for a terrible combination.
There is a season to remember and appreciate life. This is that season for me.
One of my friends dad died a couple of days ago. I felt her pain and loss. I wish I could do more. Thanks to Chuck for referencing "The Prophet" where I found words of peace about death.
"Only when you drink from the river of silence shall you indeed sing.And when you have reached the mountain top, then you shall begin to climb. And when the earth shall claim your limbs, then shall you truly dance."
I watched a Discovery channel special on the 2004 Tsunami the other night. Parts of a video where I gasped and my heart felt heavy in my chest. Oh my God.
Today, one of my friends told me his 17 year old daughter was pregnant. I felt that very deeply. Memories flooded my head and my heart sank. But I was able to promise him that everything would be okay.
There are many things about being a 17 year old mother that very few people truly understand. And it can't be explained. You truly walk alone. There is a very instant in time, a nano-second, where you become something different.
I'm thinking back on all the strife and pain that surrounded my 17 year old self. Tons of episodes that flash before my mind. And then I think of recent mornings with my children. Almost 12 years later and here we are: Listening to BEP's and The Killers together. Grossing out the 11 yr. old when I try to educate him on menstration. Sitting in their bedroom putting those damn Imaginext together. Letting my 11 year old grow his hair. Watching them zip around on the
4-wheeler w/ SLJ. Hitting a few golf balls out in the yard. Washing and folding their clothes and arguing about who gets in the shower first.
Point is, life happens and in the end, everything is just how it should be. There is strength and beauty in pain and sorrow.
This is why I laugh when people ask me what my "5 year plan" is.
As if I can control the seasons in my village. I just serve the coffee with a smile.
There is a season to remember and appreciate life. This is that season for me.
One of my friends dad died a couple of days ago. I felt her pain and loss. I wish I could do more. Thanks to Chuck for referencing "The Prophet" where I found words of peace about death.
"Only when you drink from the river of silence shall you indeed sing.And when you have reached the mountain top, then you shall begin to climb. And when the earth shall claim your limbs, then shall you truly dance."
I watched a Discovery channel special on the 2004 Tsunami the other night. Parts of a video where I gasped and my heart felt heavy in my chest. Oh my God.
Today, one of my friends told me his 17 year old daughter was pregnant. I felt that very deeply. Memories flooded my head and my heart sank. But I was able to promise him that everything would be okay.
There are many things about being a 17 year old mother that very few people truly understand. And it can't be explained. You truly walk alone. There is a very instant in time, a nano-second, where you become something different.
I'm thinking back on all the strife and pain that surrounded my 17 year old self. Tons of episodes that flash before my mind. And then I think of recent mornings with my children. Almost 12 years later and here we are: Listening to BEP's and The Killers together. Grossing out the 11 yr. old when I try to educate him on menstration. Sitting in their bedroom putting those damn Imaginext together. Letting my 11 year old grow his hair. Watching them zip around on the
4-wheeler w/ SLJ. Hitting a few golf balls out in the yard. Washing and folding their clothes and arguing about who gets in the shower first.
Point is, life happens and in the end, everything is just how it should be. There is strength and beauty in pain and sorrow.
This is why I laugh when people ask me what my "5 year plan" is.
As if I can control the seasons in my village. I just serve the coffee with a smile.
posted by tiny dancer | 12:33 PM
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